Could we have a fork?

It is not a fork designed to grab three hors d'oeuvres at a time, which would be useful out in the lobby,

Because I'd had such a bad problem with self injury that most of the cutlery in the house had been hidden, so I ended up arming myself with a plastic fork, kind of like picnic ware, and sort of sat outside the room clutching it and waiting to spring into action should anything happen.